Notes on my reading: The five love languages of children by Gary Chapman and Ross Campbell
The key concept in this book is that each of us gives and receives love in five primary ways AND that each of us values one or two of these five ways more than others. Being able to mimic the language that is most valued by our children even though that might not be our primary love language, can help the process of emotional development. It does not mean we cannot use the other love languages, as a matter of fact, we should use all modalities, but it helps to know which ones are more valued by an individual. Because, as numerous studies and documentaries have shown (including the Grant Study and the Up series), Love is all we need. So why not personalize it further and be more in tune.
So what are the five love languages?
Physical Touch - This is obvious in how this is expressed. It's likely boys get this more but girls should also be given this more in a healthy way if this is their primary love language.
Quality Time - This really is as simple as it sounds. A lot of childhood misbehavior is an attempt to get more attention from Mom and Dad, even if it is negative attention.
Words of Affirmation - More than general praise, it is specifically pointing out characteristics and abilities that make them one-of-a-kind. Finding opportunities to affirm kids multiple times a day gives them the courage to keep going and attempt even more.
Gifts - Meaningful gifts are symbols of love and hold special memories.
Acts of Service - These are the big and little things we do that show our care.
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